Crossings part 4

Name:Kate Wilson Maston

What does death mean to me?

Sir, you asked me what my thoughts about death are. Well after hours of sorrow and mourning, I can only sum it up in two words: It hurts. The pain of losing someone you love dearly is something you can’t imagine unless you have experience it yourself. You see a few days back my fiancé was involved in a terrible act of terror. It blew my husbands to bits, leaving only the top half in fact. I will leave the gruesome parts as you can already imagine what my husband will look like without me tell you.

You see as I am writing this essay for you my eyes are now swollen with tears and my heart aches with every word I type. But I need to get to share my sorrow with someone, and you are the only one I can trust. What about my friends you asked me? Well it’s only a day after the explosion that my best friend is actually the sister of the person who killed my husband, and several other victims with him. That’s what hurt the most. Staring in the eyes of your best friend, both realizing that their loved ones are dead. One dying in the act of duty whiles the other in the act of terror. We couldn’t bear to face each other again, because every time I stared into her face the incident will come upon my vivid mind.

People say that when these happen to Christians our faith will be strengthened. Sir, I don’t really know who to have faith anymore. How can death bring me closer to God? Every time I asked God why. Why Mike? Why must God let this to happen? Doesn’t God keep me safe from harm, away from pain and hurt? I just don’t really know. I just don’t.

It’s not the only explosion that happened that day. Heard from the news that another explosion happened in a mall a few blocks away. It happened right on a shop that was selling baby clothes. Baby clothes sir! How can anyone be so cruel? How can anyone be so evil to kill children? Innocent children!

I was about to keep in a secret from him till he comes back home that day. I regret the day never got the chance to tell him. He would be so glad. I planned to tell him, waiting for the anticipation of his reaction. How am I going to tell my baby about his father? That he died an honorable death? Will he be able to accept that? Will he hate me because he was born without a father?

What does death mean to me again? It means enduring a period of sorrow and pain. It means having to lose faith in the world. It means how humans are able to create and destroy life at their will. Is this the way the world is coming to? If that’s the case I would rather leave it before the show ends.